Fear of failure

I really want to go to lunch. T-minus 21 minutes and counting.

I think I am either starting to get better at my job or I am doing a lot of things wrong which give me the false impression that I am on top of things. I guess only time will tell. I think my absolute least favorite thing about this job is that I am constantly thinking I am going to screw up or that I have screwed up. I have spent a lot of time analyzing this. I am not afraid of getting yelled at, per se, because that is inevitable. And so far, I have figured out that nothing I do is irreversible or life threatening. And yet, I am so hard on myself I constantly have a stomach ache and my heart races. I have even cut down on my coffee consumption (which, if you know me, is a big deal) to one cup in the morning and that is it. I am just hoping that this fear of failure or being fired or whatever it is subsides soon.

I am going to stare at the clock until I can go to lunch. That's bound to make the time pass faster-- right?